29.06.09 by Jeff

Major Lazer Giveaway!

Major Lazer is a Jamaican commando who lost his arm in the secret zombie war of 1984 and had it replaced by a lazer. His fantastic debut album was produced by Diplo and Switch and I have two prize packs to give away!!! Each prize pack includes the album Guns Don’t Kill People…Lazers Do on vinyl and cd, and a t-shirt!

major lazer diplo switch giveaway booooooom

Unfortunately, this is only open to US residents! So if you live in the United States and want a prize pack, answer this question:

If you were a commando and lost both of your arms, what would you have them replaced with?

Leave a comment below.

Two winners will be selected Wednesday July 1st.

http://www.myspace.com/majorlazer

http://twitter.com/majorlazer





  • http://tommarques.com Tom Marques

    not US resident, but will answer anyway.

    I would put mechanical arms stuffed with guns and fight in an videogame, like Jax of Mortal Kombat :)

    http://mkw.mortalkombatonline.com/mka/jax/cutout.png

  • http://blindslug.tumblr.com baker

    easy, a fountain beverage gun like they have at bars on one side, and a flame thrower on the other. duh.

  • danny

    a crocodile (left) and a jack la lanne power juicer (right).

  • http://www.diptnyc.wordpress.com Matthew Hanna

    Replace one arm with a turntable w/ built in woofers that is fed from a string of bullets in a sling and shoots out hot 5″ vinyls at the enemy the other arm is the needle to scratch that transforms into a water gun. Stay DIPT NYC!
    Mr.Ice Cream Man

  • http://jamiemorganart.blogspot.com Jamie Morgan

    If I lost both arms I would have them replaced with a Bubble Gun and a huge can of Silly String !

  • http://www.shotbykim.com Kim

    One of them would definitely be a camera that was on a continual self timer. Instant documentary portraits of my life.
    The other i’m thinking maybe a wooden spoon. It could serve as a weapon and also as a baking tool. Those big wooden spoons are also good for spankings so maybe I could get a side job in an S&M parlor.

  • Elise

    If I were to lose both arms I would have one arm be a robotic arm that had secret comparments like a Swiss Army knife, and the other one would be like an arm of a record player with a turntable.

  • ben

    If I lost both of my arms, I would want them to be replaced by cobras.

  • Andrew Maruska

    I only see one possibility for the solution… and that is to replace my arms with two Major Lazers… the ultimate weapon.

  • Will

    Left arm = an accordion
    Right arm = a video camera

  • http://teamsweeting.tumblr.com Kamel

    If I lost both of my arms I would replace one with Farrah Fawcett and the other with Michael Jackson.

    • D.

      hahaha! ftw.

  • Klay

    If I lost both of my arms I would want DNA from Bruce Lee to be used to grow me some new ass-kickin’ nun-chuckin’ face smashers!

  • Leigh Bernstein

    …one of my arms would shoot out sunbeams and the other, laserbeams!

  • Bre

    If I lost both of my arms, I would want them replaced with an AK-47 and a machete, but given my lack of health care I would have to settle for a NERF gun and a rusty spoon duck taped to my stubs.

  • Lexi L

    If I lost both of my arms, I would want one to be a high speed tennis ball gun and the other to be the neck and head of a fire breathing dragon…

  • http://twitter.com/moneyworth Meaghan

    If I lost both my arms, I would want one to be replaced with a small arm-shaped Heineken mini-keg with tap, and the other to be replaced with an Audrey Hepburn-style cigarette holder.

  • Lexi L

    If I lost both my arms, I would want one to be a high-speed tennis ball gun and the other to be the neck and head of a fire breathing dragon…

  • http://www.adamjustkidding.com Adam

    I would have my arms replaced with licorice twists. They would have to be replaced daily though, as I would eat them.

  • http://www.youtube.com/ambroziak Ambroziak

    Left Arm: great white shark.

    Right Arm: Febreze. That sharks prolly gonna go bad.

  • MHEP

    Lazer (of course) on one arm and a beer koozie on the other.

  • http://www.flickr.com/coreytegeler Corey Tegeler

    I’d replace each arm with two arms and each of those arms would have two arms and so on and so on. Then I’d go around to 8th grade math classes explaining exponents

  • http://ihardlyknowher.com/alecbrinegar alec

    ARM 1 = Drum stick (not the ice cream)

    ARM 2 = Drum stick (maybe the ice cream)

  • Trap Counselor

    One arm would be replaced with a bread knife and the other would be a regenerating baguette. Then I’d feed the world like a deformed, french jesus.

  • Carol

    arm 1 : ultimate camera with every kind of lens i could imagine
    arm 2 : a pen. that also functions as a flamethrower/blowtorch.

  • http://www.jollybegood.com JollyBeGood

    Trap counselor, right on.

  • mike

    My mother was an invisible robot fighting in world war one who was captured (accidentally in a booby trap net) and impregnated by scientists in Britain. When I was born, I lost my arms and my mother in an accident at the lab. The only scientist left gave me an apple and a stick for arms because I told him (I could already talk) I wanted something organic and I didn’t want to be a robot like my mom. I eventually had my stick carved into a shank by the scientist during a grunge like period in my life, while during that same period discovered smoking weed. I ended up using my stick arm to make a pipe out of the apple and then ate the apple after I got high, but now its infested with 4 foot worms so it’s kinda cooler than an apple.

  • Jen

    If I lost both my arms I would have them replaced with super robotic limbs that shoot lasers and prop up apple juice boxes into my mouth so I don’t go thirsty while killing zombies.

  • Robert B Cooper

    Who needs human arms? Dr. Will Magnos inspects the damage and after a few buckets of puke he explains his design. Magnos explains that most of my body will be replaced in order to support my upper body. I notice regret in his tone of voice. Regret for ever allowing me into his lab. The doctor must not like working on human beings but he doesn’t know me. I tell him that he can replace everything except for my eyes, my ears, and my mouth. Those must be reserved for my revenge on that Fuck that did this to me. I want to see him squirm under my heel. I want to hear his pleading and speak these last words in his ears: “The greatest revenge is leaving you disfigured like me and allowing you to live in agony. But the best part is knowing that I did this to you.”

    I fall asleep to the buzzing of a drill that burns into my flesh. When my eyes open I almost don’t recognize the grotesque figure in the ceiling mirror. As I inspect it I recognize portions of my torso and my face. I make eye contact with myself and smile.

  • http://staceymadethis.com stacey

    Cats!

  • http://www.michaelalvarezart.com FOO

    thumbs

  • http://thegang.tumblr.com KB

    If I lost both arms I would have one replaced with an extra large protractor for measuring things and doodling circles, and the other with a turntable deck.

    p.s. major lazer is the business.

  • http://homecoming.tumblr.com Spencer C

    If I were a commando and lost both of my arms, I would want one to be replaced with a super strong bionnic arm, and the other with some type of gun that can also transform into other types of guns.

  • Emily

    I would replace my arms with more arms but that have the Jackson 5 as fingers on one hand and Horses as the other 5.

  • brandy

    i would replace both with an arm.
    arms are pretty important.
    i would have lazer fingertips however.

  • Emily D

    Left Arm: Puppy!
    Right Arm: Self-healing cookie.

    I would have SO MANY FRIENDS. I would also be totally worthless otherwise, but that’s why I’d need friends!

  • http://www.hayleypowers.com Hayley P T K

    In an effort to remember happier times and delude the grim reality of my own mortality I would not attach a lazer, or a microwave. I would not find solace even in a regenerating arm made of delicious sausage that I could feed the hungry children of the world with. No, I would face the thing that made me feel that I had to become a commando in the first place…my love for jump-roping. I gave it up when teased on the playground for stooping so low as to enjoy such a fey girlie activity. But I loved it so.
    I have not felt joy since.
    I would request to have a jump-rope in place of both my arms. Neon pink laced with golden tinsel.

  • http://thatsnice.tumblr.com maxine lopez-keough

    The Olsen Twins.
    Duh.

    • andrew

      who wouldn’t want to have them at hand to recite their witty yet insightful dialogue from full house at your beck and call?

  • http://oyeme.tumblr.com Hawa

    No question they would have to be replaced with a mutant MRI scanner, and Oxy Clean for up-keeping purposes. (RIP Billy Mays)

  • Feesh

    A Samus Aran Cannon on the right and a ShamWow on the left. HAHA!

  • http://www.ajavery.com A.J. Avery

    I’d like mine replaced with a swiss army knife and the other Dairy Queen Soft serve machine, complete with crunch cone sprinkle gun.

  • Charlotte Watson

    Secret zombie war of 84? SNAP

    If i were to loose my arm, I suppose I would replace it with a fan… like a helicopter top or something.

  • Kyle

    Mine would be replaced with a soft serve ice cream machine.

  • rey

    LEFT: Harvey Keitel (Bad Lieutenant era)

    RIGHT: Handheld Electronics Docking Station

  • Nic

    i’d replace both arms with chain saws

    • http://matchbookseeksmaniac.blogspot.com kebin

      me too!

  • http://www.flickr.com/photos/kylo1 Kylo

    George Forman Grill on the Left. Never-Ending Sharpie marker on the Right. Bam!

  • Tina H

    Alligators.

  • http://wreckandslender.com bryce

    I’m gonna hafta go with a melodica for the right arm and one of ALF’s legs (you hardly ever get to see those things anyway) for the left arm. MAJOR LAZER!

  • http://www.google.com/reader/shared/13877174369870733453 danielle

    i have two options.
    option a) each arm would be replaced with wheels. it would be such a quick and easy way to get about town on handstand.

    option b) i would like one arm to become replaced with one of those ball guns from american gladiators (!!!) and the other one would be a leatherman multi-function tool. The leatherman could fix the ballgun when it broke.
    The leatherman can fix anything. It is practical; the macgyver of tools.

  • TJ

    A unicorn horn on one arm and a pair of tongs on the other.

  • nick

    t- rex arm on the right and a pez dispenser on the left

  • http://www.hoodablah.com Mariana Blanco

    i’d replace one with diplo, one with switch

  • ek

    2 tentacles

  • Hunter

    My arm would be replaced with a cat, serving the purpose of my best friend and to shove in the faces of my allergic enemies.

  • Schae

    i don’t have an answer really… probably a rainbow on one arm and diplo’s face on the other.

    but can someone please agree with me on this: switch’s junk in that picture is ridiculous.

    • nick

      hahahaha

    • Marsha

      lol my god you should win for noticing this

  • http://stg54.com Shane

    A penis and vagina.

  • Josh

    A Subway sandwich.

  • Sally

    I would replace them with butterfly wings. Weird yes, but awesome at the same time.

  • jb roe

    left: curtis mayfield
    right: mutated owl

  • Daryl King

    A golden dick…nuff said

  • Nettie

    my left arm would be replaced by a tiny, ferocious tiger and my right arm would be replaced by elliott smith’s robot hand (which is the future).

  • Will Clark

    New Arms? If that counts, they come in ‘handy’

  • Michael

    if i lost my arms i would make the right arm advice dog with interchangeable sayings
    and the left arm would be rachel ray’s face so every time i went for a high five she would get hit in the face.

  • gault

    two caterpies duh

  • http://www.saltedplanet.org saltedplanet

    hating on people who left the US ,eh. Still love ya US but had to leave ya…

    • http://www.jeffhamada.com/ jeffhamada

      its actually just a request from the marketing company to keep it US only.

  • andrew

    bicycle wheels

  • Jim

    Right Arm: A rabid wolverine with a fishing rod attached to it’s back, so I can go fishing with it and have it devour the fish that I catch. The wolverines diet consists of fish, celery n peanutbutter combined, and plain oatmeal.

    Left Arm: Hideo Kojima’s brain with a car battery lodged in it and electricity forming around it and some googly eyes scotch taped to the frontal lobe. The brains diet consists of Mountain Dew, which i would have a vat of to dip it into whenever it thirsts.

  • http://www.drunkunkle.blogspot.com drunkunkle

    left arm: male emperor penguin
    right arm: female emperor penguin

    purpose: breed an army of vampire killing emperor penguins

  • catcon

    If my arms were destroyed i would replace them with……. more arms!

  • Vonbim

    i’d have one arm made of laughter and the other made from the dismay of a fisherman’s past. its a 1-2 combo. Kapow!

  • http://www.roflcopter.tumblr.com RFLCPTR

    Personally, I’d get very tricked out arms but if I were a Jamaican commando…

    Steel Drums. Definitely. Maybe Red Stripe. Nah, steel drums.

  • William

    What about flappy strips of corned beef? I would look like that big flappy thing in a car wash.

  • chris swan

    How about replacing them with bionic crab pinchers. I always wanted to go around and pinch people!

  • Justin

    Speakers.

    Can’t go wrong with constant music.

  • slycooley

    Right: The genie from I Dream of Jeannie, so that way she distracts foes while granting hecka wishes.

    Left: Bionic Swiss Army Knife like hand that also includes two levels of lazer shooting awesomeness.

  • http://www.kylelamar.com/ Kyle LaMar

    I’d replace them with my legs. Oh wait then I don’t have legs… crap.

  • http://www.kylelamar.com/ Kyle LaMar

    Wait, is it too late to change my answer? Cause I decided I would want rock em’ sock em’ robots. One red, one blue.

  • http://jacikessler.com Jaci Kessler

    Duh I’d want new arms

  • http://www.jeffhamada.com/ jeffhamada

    THE CONTEST IS NOW CLOSED. The two winners are:

    JB Roe and AJ Avery! You will both receive emails confirming you as the prizepack winners.