So there are three consecutive frustrations: the frustration of need, the frustration of fantasized satisfaction not working, and the frustration of satisfaction in the real world being at odds with the wished-for, fantasized satisfaction. Three frustrations, three disturbances, and two disillusionments. It is, what has been called in a different context, a cumulative trauma; the cumulative trauma of desire. And this is when it works.”
― Adam Phillips, Missing Out: In Praise of the Unlived Life
https://www.sadna4u.com/he/rishon-lezion-clinical-psychologist-recommendations-addiction